9
Aug
..and it was yet another perfect day in Paradise…
In fact – it has been now for the past 3 days..that is how quick time flies when you are having fun !!
All agree…??
Yep – we all agree !!
We have NO AGENDA and NO RUSH for the next 14 days…
so we had plenty of time to stop…..
…and be silly at the lunch table…..
FANTASTIC just to be able to order ANYTHING off the menu…and it is food we KNOW !!!!
and like !!!
But my toes and my bag were equally happy when we finally hit the beach !!
That is after all what we came for!!
Oh, and to be together as a family off course…..
….ALL of us….
The perfect ending to another perfect day ….
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7
Aug
Summer holiday started 2 months ago – in case you missed that – we have been at home for these 2 months !!!
YES. HOME SWEET HOME. That deserves a whole blog (or 5 ) – another day….!!!
But finally time came for us to take off to have our share of summer break – and this time around……
ALOHA……need I say more ?!
Day 3 into our holiday now, but here is an update on the flight thru day one from the moment we left home……
They say a holiday is all about the planning – well, I planned WELL this time round!!!!!
Got me a new bag at LOTTE DUTY FREE the month before.
Had ONE mission after I got my boarding pass..
This one is for you Sarina !
ooooooohhh…….Could not WAIT to get my hands on it….
Yes – it deserves 3 pictures… I was THAT happy!!
As we passed the KIPLING store – Monkey saw another monkey – on a bag….in her favourite colour….
……so, she had to have it
I trained my daughter well…. !!!
Off we go…. posing for a last photo at the gate…
just like the locals do it !!
(have we overstayed perhaps a little ???…..)
On the plane – I took this picture from a magazine…
I have never even thought about the fact that there are people who has this job…
maybe I have also been in my room for too long…???
and i took a picture of this picture…. YUM
BAKLAVA – does this looks like heaven and holiday…
Only thing is we are not going to Greece…anyway…
Back to in-flight entertainment!
Look mom ! No hands… I mean both hands??!
BOTH hands – at the same time??
Lolllipop has a peculiar way of coloring…
THe great part about flying economy class this time round is that the BIG KIDS also take up coloring again – the movie-thing is just not quite up to scratch on this flight?!
We ARRIVED !!
Oh how clever these resorts are…planting a STARBUCKS in Hotel Reception !
But trust Einstein – he has a way of opening the room when your hands are full…
but jet-lag kicked in before we could even get to the beach.
Other had ONE mission in mind
– Finding a SCUBA DIVING instructor/ course..
FINALLY the holiday started !!!
Lollipop runs AWAY from the sea though…is it possible that in her short lifespan we have not really taken her to the beach…ever ??!!
but it’s still FUN !!
Dinner time and Waiting for the FOOD …
and I am just simply fascinated by the “silver” plastic cutlery – oh America the great !!!
but jetlag also starts to catch up with even the bravest among us !!!!
Oh man – I hate my mom and her camera ??!!!
But – that flash did wake me up though….
And Finally – blissful sleep as the first day ends.
AWESOME!!
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6
Aug
This blog started off (in my mind at least) so that I could write about things that I had somehow planned in my head or thought about as an intial idea…even if that idea in the end never turned out to be the great idea I anticipated ….
And I even had an IDEA what I wanted those things to be..??! Still makes sense??
Yes – I usually think I have it ALL figured out – long before I even start with something !!
Most of all – I didn’t want to do a “mommy” blog – who out there wants to read about me and my family all day long??? ….
and at the same time…I didnt (and still dont) want to really put my family out there…showcased – for others to have their opinions and comments on how annoying something was that I thought was really cute – or the other way round??!!! There is something novel and stylish about keeping things private – keeping things “exclusive” to those who really, really knows you….so, even MENTIONING my family on my blog was crossing that line of “exclusivity”…….
REALITY is however that I AM a mom …….and a wife …….and many, if not MOST of the things that happen on a daily basis, how I view things, what is important and how it affects me and my ideas and my world, comes from that perspective..so it is also somewhat impossible to try and make sense of the things that I say if you dont know me and my family and why I say things the way I say or see them! Blogging is about keeping it real and it is impossible to keep it real if you constantly have to be “SO” strategic that you can hardly think straight !!
I can do that type of blog – VERY easily – I have many things I observe, many things I think the world would love to hear…but those kind of things should not be around family and should also not be mixed up with family life if you want to attract a certain reader population! That is a WHOLE different kind of blog !! About this world and all its weird and wonderful people…. But my dilemma is also that my good judgement often times prevent me from saying certain things – simply because they would hurt or be funny on one level but perhaps insensitive on another…and then there is most certainly the notion that some things are better left unsaid…..
So – the stumbling blocks for blogging started to stack up – not to even mention the fact that everything I write is not even in my native language..which means it is even a little harder to say things exactly the way it would come out..if just spoken from the heart and not have to go pass the mind before putting it in writing….??!
I know what “sells” a blog – what make people wanna read, and what makes people wanna come back…And initially that was my idea…. to come later with an “offering” on my blog…
REALITY once again was that I have FOUND THE ‘offering”, but have NOT YET had the TIME to get that all up and running – TOO many THINGS…TOO LITTLE TIME – Typically me, for those who know me…..and then there was the BIG question – who do really blog for – for a FOLLOWING??? creating a crowd so you could feel good about yourself – or to write for YOURSELF…. having an outlet when you need it…?????
SO….What to do then??? To blog or not to blog??!!
Strangest thing is that I hardly ever (almost close to never) got a “Comment” on my blog – for many reasons known to me, but besides the point for now…..BUT the great thing is that that did not mean people did not read and/or respond??!!
I received e-mails in response to things people read on the blog…..
I have to admit that it is great to comment – from a person bold enough to say it on a blog (usually bloggers who are not afraid to comment in public) and it is as great to get an e-mail…. from someone I do or do not know or knew long ago…
and that has made me decide to keep on writing…to keep on blogging…..
because just today I received another e-mail that has opened up a whole new chapter for me in my life and where I am right now…..
EVERY single comment and EVERY single e-mail has been extremely gratifying and the great thing is that it became less and less important what I blog about, but the fact that I do.
That makes blogging worth its while !! To know that a friend giggled about something I said….and another wants my red shoes if I think I will only wear them once !!! Or someone felt the heartache with me on another matter…or helped me make up my mind about some decisions I had to make…….or took the time to write me a 10 point plan and tell me what he enjoys about me ……or to know somebody out there cares enough to take the time to write – about something that lies so close to my heart and that may just be a key piece in one of my life puzzles !
What a great idea it was to open up this blog today and dust it off a little !
What to blog about – what NOT to blog about ???
What to say and what to rather NOT say????
Which parts to keep private and which parts to go public??????
I have a fairly clear idea. I dont think the tiny details matter and I still want to protect my family in all of this….dont think the world out there really needs to know their names, and their fears and all our tears……the whole world dont need to share in every bit of laughter, every activity or action……..and I will keep it that way. It is still hard to not write or post pictures of friends and family…..because they are such an integral part in all of this….but I respect that – and please remind me if I ever cross that line without permission !!!!…….but it is time to use this blog as a tool – keeping it real !!!!
And then – who knows…one day when I am ready, I might find the time to turn it into the REALITY of the initial IDEA I had about this blog – something STRANGERS wanna read about…something that will create a FOLLOWING… here we go again…the blogger’s blurred vision…..
BUT – UNTILL THEN !!!! and for NOW !!!!!-
I have decided to forget about the initial idea and just blog about me and my life and my family and everything else that might pop into my head….RANDOMLY !!! WHo cares if it even fits into the theme??!
I cant keep up with keeping everyone informed and stay in touch with all those who care…
So, here is to going public – sharing with those who are caring !
This might come back and BITE me..but untill then –
Happy BLOGGING to me…Happy READING to you !!!!!
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9
Jul
Those lists were glaring at me for a day…so I started the huge project of getting things OFF THE LIST !!!
Jumped into action that same day and swopped 4 rooms in the house.
The old toyroom went from this:
to this……
with everyone getting involved…
and some even a little in the way…??!!
ooooh…that evil look I got when I found her??!!
I see a GARAGE SALE coming up – can’t believe it ?!
Have never been a garage sale person…but this is now my last resort of de-cluttering my life .
What a shame – so many perfectly good and valuable toys, but WAY in EXCESS and the space could be put to better use !
Now to put a new life into this room…
and THAT is the part I REALLY LOVE DOING !!!
and the reality of the money it takes…uggh !!!
But – will see what I can do ….
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9
Jul
I am a LIST person. Once I have everything on a “to do” list…I can sit back and relax.
I feel like I achieved a lot, even though I have not even made a start ?!
All the million things that are on my mind, are jotted down and I can start to think and focus again…not feeling the burden of all the things I have to (or sometimes “choose” to) do…
Making the list is a huge milestone in itself to me.
Here are my lists – now you can laugh at me …
(This is a little piece of the inside of my brain – on STICKY NOTES !!!)
Yes – it is neverending….
and the scary part is that every little post-it represents a ton of work…
so, be afraid..
be very afraid if you are anywhere near me and in a place where you could get ordered around by me to lend a hand..!!!!!
But I have every intention to start NOW and DO the things I jotted down.
Gotta go…need to go fill up these pages !!
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7
Jul
…can never have enough of those, can you??
Bought these ones the other day – oh, so cheeky… will wear them maybe ….once??
But couldn’t resist – nevertheless…..
They are not the most practical kind….
…but you need those kinds of shoes too..! Sure, you’ll agree. Thanks. Thought so.
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5
Jul
Yesterday we ended up behind this truck…..it felt like looking straight into my head…and my LIFE at this specific point in time !!
I have so many things piled up on top of each other…in no specific order and a lot of junk inbetween the useful bits?!
The load is a little too heavy for the capacity of my brain right now and some bits are at high risk of simply dropping off somewhere along the road….although I have it all tied in and attached to me – somehow…….anxiously clinging to every bit that I possibly can carry around with me!!
I could not help but wonder whether all these pieces are REALLY worth taking along and whether the owner should have not taken stock a little bit deciding which ones are really worth over-burdening the body of his truck?? But then again- who am I to suggest a crazy idea like that???? – maybe he is exactly like me – not able right now to determine what is important, what is urgent, what is needed, what can wait, what can go…… simply carrying EVERYTHING along – hoping that one of these good days – I will find the time to sort between it all and put it ALL to good use and in good order and find a PLACE for every little item and every bit of detail I want to somehow orchestrate !
I am sure I am not the only one whose load looks like this???!!! It is just that it was never my idea to end up like this??! But it ended up one of those nasty realities that made me think of this blog.
See – I am a SUPER organiser ! Yes..that is one thing I have enough proof of and others to vouch for it, that I can say it with confidence. Because – to be honest..my first instinct was to pull this guy over to the side of the street and unpack the whole truck, sort it between like-items and then to re-pack it from him in a neat, tidy, organised way that would make any mess look like a Martha Stewart invention.
But, I have my own sorting out to be done. So – I just let him go…
I am just wondering why I dont let go a few of my “ideas”…a few of my “projects” …. a few “items” that I really do not need to have anymore…. a few activities that I really dont need to squeeze into a day that has too little hours already…WHY oh WHY do I carry a load like this in my mind, my body, my house and my LIFE??!!!!
It happened over a couple of months…
Things got a little out of hand over the past few months when stress took the better of me… And so things started to end up in little corners of my house and some in little corners of my head….and now they need to all fall back into place.
I have a life strategy – and that is to have a SPECIFIC place for EACH SPECIFIC item …and that somehow got a little off track when life got too busy and too complicated. And in a house of 650 square meters (almost 7000 square foot), that can very easily happen ! But looking at this guy yesterday and just laughing at the very idea that people will look at me this way if they had ANY idea what goes on in my head and house right now…… I am very determined to sort that ALL out…. before anyone notices (am I the only thinking no one noticed??!!….)
In principle I have taken a decision to de-clutter my life….and are somewhat in process…..
and I will report back on my progress on this blog (by the way – did I mention that keeping a blog was exactly to find a place where I could blow off steam when I got run over by this “life-truck of stuff” of mine…)
I am not a clutter-person and dont have a lot of junk…but I DO have a lot of STUFF !! It creates some level of discomfort to think that I will just get rid of some things and the next week I would need one of the old masks I chucked in the bin for one of the kids’ dress up costumes for a concert or something !!
But then again – I try to think of the load that will be lifted off my shoulders once I have at least scanned every item in this house again and have sifted through things and will feel on top of it !!
There is nothing wrong with having all the things..but when I realised that when I could not pay full attention anymore, it got the better of me..then I realised it is too much. It can only be good as long as it can stay under control without having someone to have to pay full attention to keeping things under control all the time.
So, I better be off to start sifting and sorting…. starting with my house and the items around me…then the almost 90 000 photos on my computer that needs organising and then last – but CERTAINLY not least – starting to go through the IDEAS in my head ..that I keep toying around with and that I hope ONE DAY I will have time to turn into REALITIES…so I would have some REAL IDEAS to blog about !!!!!
The truck’s body, carrying the load, is also not quite what it used to be…. or should be..or could be…SAME HERE …..but taking into account that it still carries the rest, it survives…but only just survives…definitely does not thrive…..and is a little shameful, to say the least. It is exactly because of the load it carries, that there is not really time to think of or spent time on getting the body back in shape…and while it is still able to do the job…well, I guess – it just sometimes does…so – it is not just the pile ON TOP..but the body below – that is all in need of serious sorting out….
But – first things FIRST… I will report back !
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19
Jun
Today I feel like blogging about all the million things I have not blogged about. Things that are mulling over in my head and things I should have said out loud.
I got caught up with wanting to make it perfect, wanting to add a photo, wanting to say something interesting that others would wanna read…
But – who cares…thats not why i wanna blog. I just want to let it out…
I have things I want to say – but I am too caring…too worried that people that I say things about will read it one day – by chance, by mistake…and that might hurt their feelings….. so…again… I am cautious about what i say.. WHY ? What’s the point of blogging then? Where can you let it all out…???!!!!
Maybe when I have that all figured out, I can start to freely blog !!!
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14
Jun
This morning I woke up to a mail that my mom’s dog died….
What sad news to wake up to??!
I am far away from where this all is happening…and I dont know what my mom’s reaction is to all this. I have not yet spoken to anyone as they are asleep in that country now.
This little dog has been her “life” and comfort for a number of years…. and was given to her because we read in a book about Alzheimers that a pet is a perfect companion for a person in her position. And it was…..this little doggy stood by her in times where it became difficult for everybody else to do that…she stayed loyal to her even if she did not have the capacity anymore to take proper care of her. She knew that she was loved by her and vice versa and that was all that mattered to the two of them…..
The saddest part to all of this is also the most comforting part… My mom’s dementia is causing her to probably not get the fact that this happened… she will not realise the impact of the news and would probably never know about the accident that happened when she was run over by a car outside her place of care….
Like her illness this is affecting everyone around her, especially my dad, who are the ones having to cope and mourn this loss of another precious soul in our lives….
And for our kids who felt like she was our own – the only comforting part was that “maybe she will now be friends with our little puppy who died earlier…so they can play in doggy heaven…..
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25
May
How do you tell a friend the truth?
What people say and what people think and what you personally think…..could so easily be discussed behind someone’s back…but few have the guts to say it out loud.
Or do they have the guts, but they feel the pain of what it would feel like telling your friend the truth…and then rather avoid telling…because it is much nicer to not have any uncomfortable not-nice-to-hear-truths that could potentially come inbetween a precious friendship.
I hate that – thinking something and not sharing that thought…
But then again – if it is a true friend, they should know your intention, know that you care and know that you do this for them..
I would like my friends to tell…. I will just tell…and hope for the best.
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